1. "Never." "Never" implies a sense of hopelessness and finality. When you use "never," you're telling your spouse that they are no good, will never be any good and that there's no hope for change. It's an all-or-nothing phrase that does not lend itself to listening, compromising and creating good will
2. "Always." "Always" implies a sense of rigidity and righteousness. When you use "always," you're telling your spouse that they are wrong, you are right, and that there's nothing that can be done about it. It's also an all-or-nothing phrase, and it does not lend itself to understanding, learning, or healing.
3. "But." "But" implies a sense of manipulation and a lack of integrity. When you use "but," you negate whatever was said before. It invalidates your message and turns a positive statement into a negative one. It's a conjunction that does not lend itself to building trust, credibility and intimacy. Similar words to avoid include "however" and "although."
4. "*#%&." Use your imagination and fill in the blanks and what you're left with is a vulgar, obscenity-laced attack. Any way you look at it, attacking your spouse by name-calling will cause irreparable damage. Doing this regularly will surely destroy your spouse's soul and kill the marriage. Outright contempt has no place in a marriage.
5. "Divorce." Threatening to divorce, suggesting divorce as an option, or accusing your spouse of destroying the marriage will lead to just that. A divorce is a very serious decision, and using it as a weapon or method of control creates anxiety and despair. It's not conducive for effective communication, conflict resolution, problem solving, or intimacy.
Wichita Flight Festival Poster Contest
Showcase your creativity by designing a commemorative poster for the 2013 Wichita Flight Festival that will be held Sept. 28-29 at Jabara Airport. The deadline to submit entries is June 28.
The poster design selected as the winning entry will be printed and distributed as advertisement for this year's event. A $1,000 award will be given to the winning artist, $500 to the second-place artist and $250 to the third.
Details about the poster contest and the festival's air acts and entertainment can be found at WichitaFlightFestival.com.
USES FOR COFFEE FILTERS - Who Knew?
1. Cover a bowl of food with a coffee filter to prevent splattering when cooking in the microwave.
2. Coffee filters can shine your mirrors, TV screen and your computer monitor.
3. Prevent rust in your stored iron cookware by placing a coffee filter in it to absorb moisture.
4. Clean your glasses with a coffee filter and they will be lint free.
5. Place a coffee filter over the drain hole in the bottom of a planter so the soil won't leak out.
6. Cork bits get into your wine? Use a coffee filter to separate the wine from the cork bits.
7. Coffee filters can keep your fingers clean if you serve a messy hot dog or popcorn in them.
8. Put baking soda into a coffee filter and insert into shoes or a closet to absorb or prevent odors.
9. After deep fat frying, use coffee filters to help catch the small food remnants from the oil.
10. Use a coffee filter to prevent spilling when you add fluids to your car.
11. Prevent a Popsicle from dripping. Poke one or two holes as needed in a coffee filter.
12. Do you think we used expensive strips to wax eyebrows? Use strips of coffee filters.
13. Put a few in a plate and put your fried bacon, French fries, chicken fingers, etc on them. Soaks out all the grease.
14. Keep in the bathroom. They make great "razor nick fixers